Teeny Tiny Feet!!

Dear Kacie,

I had a moment of sadness today as I realized I wouldn't have my cute (ginormous) belly for much longer!

I thought of all my comfy maternity clothes that I won't get to wear anymore...

I realized that I wouldn't have a reason to get dressed every Wednesday to take my weekly "Awkward Pregnancy Photo"

I swear it's bigger than it was 2 days ago!

And then I had to pee.

And I realized that I am not going to miss it that much.

And then you stuck your little foot out the side of my stomach.

And I got so excited for you to be here so I can touch that little foot of yours!

And now I am praying REEEAAAALLLLY hard that you will come right now.

I'm anxious for you to get here so my body can start going back to "normal" and daddy is anxious for you to get here so that I will stop talking about how anxious I am for you to get off my bladder!! Haha =)

Anyway, I have to pee again.

Love,
Mom and Dad

T- One Week... Hopefully!

Dear Kacie,

You can come now...

Or now...

Maybe... NOW!

No?

Ok.

But you only have as long as it takes for me to use the last 9 Tums that I have.

I refuse to buy more.

How 'bout now?

I tried.

Today you are 39 weeks!

Unfortunately, I suspect you are going to be later than your due date.

My feet are getting swollen and randomly during the day my fingers turn into large sausages for no reason. I've been wearing my wedding ring on a necklace for a few weeks now!

People keep telling me that I will not get any sleep when you are born. Maybe it's just been me but I'm pretty sure I'm not getting much sleep now anyway. I get up to use the restroom so many times at night that I don't think you can technically call it sleeping! I'm sure I will be more tired than I am now, but it's your father that people should be warning. He doesn't have to pee all night!

I'm terrified for labor and parenting but also, I'm ready. We were sent here to multiply and replenish the earth so Heavenly Father obviously gave us everything we need to be parents. It's not going to be easy, and I'm sure I don't even know how not easy it will be. But really, how many things in life are easy? Isn't that what we are here for? To learn and be tested? So let's just get this party started already!

Also, I think you're going to make your Grandma J so anxious. She really wants to be here to be one of the first to meet you. If you could just give me a sign or something to let me know exactly when you're coming that would be great!

Yesterday was your dad and I's 3rd anniversary! We had a great time... We first went out to breakfast at Kneaders. Their french toast is so delicious!

Unfortunately your dad still had to work so after breakfast we just went home for a few minutes before he left.

I celebrated the day by touching up the blue dye in my hair and giving myself a little trim. It was nothing special but it was desperately needed! And now my fingers are blue!

When your dad got home we went to dinner at The Smoking Apple. It's probably our favorite place right now.... it's so scrumptious!

Then we went home and worked on some shirts we are making. We are going to wear them the day we go home from the hospital. They are pretty awesome and funny but you don't get to see them yet!

We didn't do anything spectacular but we had a great time just spending our last anniversary alone, together.

We are so excited and nervous but ready for you to be here!

Love,
Mom and Dad

3 Years! Nailed It...

!!WARNING!!

Picture Overload

Dating : December 2009

Engaged : February 2010

Disneyland! : April 2010

MARRIED! : June 2010

Honeymoon : June 2010

Christmas : December 2010

Anniversary #1 : June 2011

First Day of School : August 2011

Jarvis Family Pictures : November 2011

Gonthier Family Pictures : December 2011

Spring Time : April 2012

Anniversary #2 : June 2012

Summer : July 2012

Date Night : October 2012

Boy or Girl? : January 2013

Pregosauraus : April 2013

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY to the best husband ever!

I am so grateful to have you in my life. As I think over the past three years I am amazed at how much more I love you each day!

When I met your family 15 years ago I never would have guessed that I would be married to you and starting a family (anytime now Kacie) with you.

I am so thankful for your silly, fun, kind and loving personality that makes me so happy in life!

We have had a lot of fun this past year as we continue our adventure in Utah. I'm forever in your debt for taking such good care of me when I was so sick. You are an amazing man and husband! I know you will be a spectacular father.

I can't wait for what this next year brings as we journey together into this next endeavor.

I love you so very much Kyle Freakin' Gonthier!!!!!!

"Marriage has less safety but more beauty than the single life. It's full of sorrows and full of joys. It lies under more burdens, but is supported by all the strengths of love, and those burdens are delightful." - Angelican Bishop

Perfect People Don't Need A Savior

One hope with my blog is that I am real and that I don't make my life look like it's picture perfect.

I think with all the sites online now-a-days we tend to either only post things that make our lives seem great or we only see posts of others that make us think everyone else has perfect lives!

BUT,

I think it's time we all admit that we aren't perfect.

I'm not saying that we just agree with that statement. I'm saying really admit it, remember it, live it and not forget that others aren't perfect either.

At a relief society activity I went to a while back we learned about the church's Addiction Recovery Program. Then we even had a little 'meeting' of our own, set up like it would have been at a real meeting. We were encouraged to share whatever we felt the need to and reminded that no one is perfect and that as others shared their stories, we should pay attention to what we could learn from them, not judge them for mistakes made.

As the sister's shared their stories, you could feel the spirit pouring into the room. The things that others had gone through or were going through were tough. BUT the most amazing thing was that these were sister's I knew and went to church with. These were sister's I looked up to and wished that I were more like!

And yet, here we were, sitting in this circle learning deep dark secrets of trials - tough trials - that others had gone through!

It was so eye opening to hear these things and realize that although we may act like our lives are almost perfect, and that we've always got it together, it made me realize that everyone is going through life the same as me! That even if our everyday challenges aren't the same the overall reality is that we are each being tested to the degree that we can handle.

So if you look at my life and think "Wow, I wish I were living Kayla's life and had her easy trials" What you should remember is that the trials I am given aren't easy for me! And that I might be sitting there thinking "Man, I wish I were living through so-and-so's trials. I could handle those."

Here is a quote by Cheiko N. Okazaki

"He's not waiting for us to be perfect. Perfect people don't need a Savior. He came to save his people their imperfections. He is the Lord of the living, and the living make mistakes. He's not embarrassed by us, angry at us, or shocked. He wants us in our brokenness, in our unhappiness, in our guilt and our grief."

Sometimes I think we get so caught up in our human feelings, like being angry and frustrated or hurt and sad that we forget we need to love and try to understand.

I think we hear something that we don't agree with or that makes us uncomfortable and instead of praying or listening or trying to understand what our friend, sibling, parent, neighbor or stranger is going through, we put up our walls and say to ourselves "I don't agree so I'm going to ignore instead"

Repentance isn't supposed to be easy. It's not supposed to be comfortable. It's supposed to be difficult. It's supposed to test us and cause us to learn humility. Repentance isn't only to repair mistakes we have made. It is to heal our hearts, heal others hearts and bring us closer to our Savior. It isn't just saying a prayer. It is admitting we are wrong, apologizing and learning. It helps us move forward. It helps us to be happier.

I wish I knew who this quote is by but I just found it in an old institute journal:

"Patience and love go hand in hand. The Savior loved everyone and in return was able to be patient with their lies and hatred. When we have love for others, we understand that they have trials and sufferings the same as we do. This helps us be patient and to try and understand what they need." -Unknown

I am not perfect.

I can be quick to judge.

I've turned my back when others needed me.

But I'm trying really hard in my every day life to stop and honestly ask myself "What would Jesus Do?"

Because if we say that we believe the gospel, then we must believe ALL the gospel. And that includes loving, forgiving, serving, acting, trying, teaching, learning, trials, hardship, joy, peace, consecration, humility, patience, sacrifice, and agency.

So if there is something or some relationship in your life that isn't quite lined up with the gospel, repair it! The Savior will greatly reward us when we actively and humbly strive to be more like Him.

Let us all try to remember that how we react to our worldly trials will effect our celestial glory and not wait another minute to fix our mistakes! Let us remember that even if we don't understand the others situation, we must have love for them and help them through their trial.

Don't let pride, or embarrassment keep us from reaching our celestial goals!

And now, watch For God So Loved the World, because scripture will always say it better than I can!

I am so grateful for a loving Savior and Father in Heaven who continually bless me and my family, even when we don't deserve it. I know that He cares and that He will do anything for me if I just ask.

I know that He is there.

I Hope I Find It Along The Way

2 posts in one day?!?!

That just goes to show you how productive I really was today.

Also, my feet hurt.

I probably should be ashamed to admit that there was laundry on my closet floor that had been there for at least 2 months.

I can proudly admit that it is no longer there!

I, once again, have a walk in closet!

In other accomplishments, I reorganized my closet shelves to make room in Kacie's closet for all of her little baby things, like diapers, wipes, a high chair, a floor play mat, and eventually her pack-n-play. We moved some things around and took several things out of her room. I got rid of garbage and Kyle hung up some adorable curtains!

I did a little bit of apartment work (cause apparently it's difficult to pay rent on time) oh and I vacuumed our floor! (that makes it sound like I never vacuum. I do, it's just not been as frequent lately cause Kacie hates chores)

Guys, I even did the dishes AND had dinner made when the hubster got home!

Ya. It was a good day.

I think I'll take tomorrow off... or maybe just a little bit slower. My feet get tired so quick and I waddle.

Anyway, I swear Kacie got 800 times bigger since yesterday.

"Kacie. You have my permission to be birthed now."

You're welcome.

I'm Ready!... Well, Mostly!

Dear Kacie,

38 WEEKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well, your due date is June 19th, but most people aren't born on their due dates. So, we had all your aunts, uncles and grandparents guess what day they think you will actually be born on and how much you will weigh and how long you will be!

Grandpa G: June 17th, 8.4lbs, 18in

Grandma G: June 18th, 7lbs 10oz, 19in

Grandpa J: June 17th, 7lbs 2oz, 21in

Grandma J: June 13th, 7lbs 2oz, 20.5in

Daddy: June 19th, 8lbs 5oz, 21in

Mommy: June 24th, 7lbs 8oz, 21in

Uncle Greg: June 19th, 14lbs, 24in (no, that's not a typo!)

Aunt Ang: June 16th, 7lbs 2oz, 17in

Uncle Trevor: June 19th, 8lbs, 18.5in

Uncle Colin: June 24th, 7lbs 3oz, 19in

Aunt Mallory: June 17th, 7lbs 5oz, 16in

Uncle Jerm: June 17th, 8lbs 5oz, 21in

Aunt Kassidi: June 21st, 7lbs 4oz, 22in

Aunt Aubree: June 21st, 9lbs, 19in 

Uncle Devin: June 20th, 6lbs 5oz, 16.5in

Some of our sweet family members are trying to kill me with their weight guesses but hopefully you will stick with the majority of guesses and be just a little above 7lbs.

After I got your G-ma Sandra's guess I freaked out a little! It made me realize that you could literally be born any time and I am not ready at all! Your room is a disaster, my room is a disaster, I don't know what else to put in my hospital bag, your dresser isn't done being sanded or stained yet, I haven't plucked my eyebrows in like 3 weeks, there are no curtains in your room, I don't know how to be a parent.... well, you get the point... I feel like I have so much to do!!

But really, if you came right now, I would be so happy! I am so uncomfortable and I pee all. the. time.

Daddy is very nervous for you to get here. I think he'd be ok with it if you gave him another 9 months to prepare. But that is not allowed and I know he will be a wonderful father! 

But just to reassure him, I occasionally remind him that if some of our neighbors have been able to keep their kids alive for as long as they have then there's no way we can fail!

Will this heart burn ever end????? I'm running out of food to eat because everything is giving me heart burn! It's very frustrating. It better go away the second you are out of me!

You may remember this post that I said we put your car seat in our new car. Well, I'm still not sure that it is in the right way! People might laugh at how difficult this seems to be for your dad and I but honestly, I'd rather worry over it and make sure it's right then just assume it's in correctly and be wrong! I promise as soon as daddy gets home we will figure it out though. It will be in there correctly before you get here!

You still don't let dad feel you move very much. But I'm hoping that after you are born, he will have that same calming effect on you. I love to feel you move but sometimes when it hurts, it's cool if your dad 'calms you down' He doesn't like it cause he wants to feel those big kicks, but it sure makes mamma happy when you're not kicking my bladder!

Well, I've got most of the things collected for my hospital bag. I'm pretty sure I have everything I need for you and I got snacks for daddy. So, if all else fails, at least you and dad will have what you need!

We love you so much!

Love,

Mom and Dad

HAPPY BIRTH MONTH

Dear Kacie,

Please stop kicking so hard.

I know you think you are a tiny little human but you can only be classified as 'tiny' when you are born.

Inside of me, you are ginormous and taking up a lot of room.

We are so close to your due date. We are now in your birth month!

I'm terrified of giving birth but I am even more excited.

Luckily the excitement is stronger than the terrifying-ness(?).

I still haven't had any contractions. I'm very interested to see what those feel like!

My hips hurt pretty bad at night... luckily they don't hurt during the day though!

Anyway, you are just moving a lot right now and it is slightly painful.

I still love you!!

Love,

Mom

(dad loves you too, but this post is all from me!)